안녕, 무슨 일이야?

So, tomorrow is my 彼氏の夢 Yuto Nakajima‘s birthay… And it is always Preliminary Exams day on his birthday.

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I did a cover of a song by 나르샤 (I’m In Love) and you could listen to it HERE.

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Anyway, this morning I was awakened by my strange dream. In my dream, I was one of the technical staff in an IYF mini-event. While the Gracias Choir was playing, I was hiding myself in the curtains while glancing at the audience and the choir. I don’t think I was seen by the audience. And then at some point, someone grabbed me and pulled me inside the backstage. The guy was holding my arm, and literally my face was like O_O? and then when he let go of my arm, he sighed, then looked at me.

“Yo, ‘sup dude? Remember me?” I don’t know who of us said this, but whoever, the answer was, “Yeah of course, I remember you!” And then this guy laid down on the floor, and told me the stories when he came back to South Korea and how he came back to the Philippines again. Then the dream transformed… I was taking flower pictures on an empty lot… then transformed again. I was in front of the computer looking at my Gmail (IRL I guess it was Naver) inbox scanning for that guy’s messages, if there were any. Until I realized, I haven’t even said good-bye to him the day he’s going back to Korea.

I don’t know the implication of this dream, but it’s weird. 시온아, 어쩌면 너가보고 싶었어요..

You’re not gonna reach my telephone.

I was searching for the meaning of the dream thing that I had last week, regarding the big moon, fire, apple trees, telephone, running a lot, and I got this.

Depending on the context of your dream, to see fire in your dream can symbolize destruction, passion, desire, illumination, transformation, enlightenment, or anger. It may suggest that something old is passing and something new is entering into your life. Your thoughts and views are changing. In particular, if the fire is under control or contained in one area, then it is a metaphor of your own internal fire and inner transformation. It also represents your drive, motivation, and creative energy.

To see the moon in your your dream, represents some hidden, mysterious aspect of yourself. It is often associated with the feminine mystique and intuition. Alternatively, the moon signifies your changing moods.

To see an apple tree in your dream, symbolizes grandeur and magnificence. You are feeling larger than life.

To dream that you do not want to answer the ringing telephone, indicates lack of communication. There is a situation or relationship that you are tying to keep at a distance.

To dream that you are running with others, signifies festive and prosperous times.

It’s right. I have been avoiding something/someone for weeks now. And I always have dreams that represent changing and stuff, like the moon and the fire. And I feel the same now as what the apple tree signified. So it has something to do with my inner self. But I don’t seem to change, or I just don’t notice?

Good morning.

The 3rd night I dream of him.

This was a rather bizarre dream compared to the past 2 ones. All I could remember was every person I know were bought to this place, and we were scattered to several different fields. It’s like a huge group was brought on this part of the field, then the next group on the other, et cetera. Meanwhile, it was me and my groups time to be on a part of the field. And then we were here in this– I’d say best part– of the field. Guess who I am with?

The next thing I remember was running along the field. There were apple trees scattered and the sun shone just right. And then there was him, my crush. He was with me all along. He ran after me, and he kept on talking to me (even on the phone in close distance). Soon, I found myself getting along with him so well, and I noticed few of my friends coming over (running as well). And I sat on a hollow/break of a tree.

Sitting there, flashbacks instantly drowned me and I could actually see it vividly on the vast sky I could almost reach. I was blabbering about these flashbacks and HE just listened. And then he talked about the moon, and he said sweet stuff. Can’t remember them but it made my heart float and I know I felt good. Then he suddenly said, “See, I told you I brought the moon with me. It’s beside you.” And the moon, the big moon, the biggest celestial being I saw in my dream, was there shining just 45 degrees and about 2 meters above me. At first I screamed, then he said that it would be okay because he is beside me. Then the phone rang.

It was a friend. He kept on calling, and I couldn’t answer because I know that answering that call would cost me 4 times than a regular call (weird). The numbers on the phone were up to 20, I guess, and there were many buttons. All I could see are 9s. Then the call stopped after 30 minutes, and we just saw that on the lower part of the field (we were at the upper, the best part) was on fire. I saw there my 2 gay friends and they were screaming. I shouted and told them to come stay with us on the upper part. Then the last thing I know, me and HIM were smiling. Whatever. The end.

I was actually smiling when I woke up, but everything was just a dream.

Beautiful Nightmare.

Hanggang sa panaginip ba naman, pangit pa rin ang pagkikita natin?

We went out of the Engineering building towards the catwalk. And I saw Kenji sitting on one of the benches there. It so happened that where he sat and what he wore yesterday was the same as in my dream, only that now, Karla was sitting beside him, and Karla kept on pointing him to me, and I just laughed. So Clarence and I went on, leaving Kenji on that bench.

The time we went out was about dusk, and we were walking very slowly that it was already dark when we reached the Plaza Mayor. We walked around the Main Building, and on the curvature towards Botanical Garden, I saw him walking in front of us, his arm resting on her shoulders. Yes, HE WAS WITH A GIRL.

And the very crazy thing was that, the girl he was with is wearing MY HIGH SCHOOL UNIFORM so I’ve got an idea that I might know her. She had long hair (maybe 2-inches longer than mine), and her hair was done the same way I do to get rid of my bangs. Clarence and I followed them to see what is happening, until there was a helicopter from above, throwing flowers and rose petals at them. Then I heard him say to the girl, “I did that just for you.” I was hit, and in my dream I was infuriating and with rage. I kept on wondering who that girl is.

And then while we followed them all around, I bumped to a girl who was acting like a spy. Turns out, we know each other.
J: I’m sorry!
Girl: Sorry po! Ay… Ate Jaun! Hello po! Ano pong ginagawa niyo dito?
J: More like, anong ginagawa MO dito?
Girl: Ah, tinitignan ko po sila *points at Kenji and that girl*
J: Anong meron?
Girl: Kasi po… May gusto po kasi siya (girl) dun sa lalaking yun, and sakto po kasi, friend ng friend ko yung guy and may gusto din daw po yung guy dun kay girl, kaya po pinag-meet up ko po sila. Mukhang ayos nga po eh.
J: Ah, ganun ba. Sige, una na ko.
Girl: Sige po ate!

Then I just followed. I wanted to cry. I kept on thinking who the girl was. And then all of a sudden, Kenji removed his arm from her shoulders and they held hands. WTFH. YES THEY DID. And after the did that, the girl he was with looked sideways (and I think she looked at me!) and I finally got a glimpse of her face.

SHE WAS MY HIGH SCHOOL SCHOOLMATE 2 LEVELS BELOW ME. She’s pretty, but I used to dislike her because she is such a flirt, but we talk. She calls me Ate Jan. AND HER INITIALS ARE THE SAME AS MINE: J.D.

So they continued to walk, when the skies turned shades of orange, purple, and thunderclaps appeared. We all looked above and a weird spacecraft appeared, and its huge propeller turned.

All of the buildings in UST transformed into a stadium, and everybody was gone, and I was alone with American people in an American game show.